If I Die Young
by Spike Xander's Drink
Summary: Kurt disapeared nearly four years ago, but now reapears as an agent under the UN and working with one Detective Puck, he is back to stop a killer. But is there something more to the ex-criminal then meets the eye? Rating may change. Con!Kurt. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

It had been almost a year since the disappearance of one short, petite brown-haired Kurt Hummel. And even Sue Sylvester was feeling the loss, but not as much as Noah Puckerman, Burt Hummel and Shelby Corkran. The three loved Kurt. Once Puck exposed Quinn to Shelby and child services, Kurt had joined the two in watching Beth and caring for her.

Puck had gone straight from graduating to the Police Academy, he was already a decorated officer because of his first day on the job he took three bullets into his leg stopping a robbery. Because of the three bullets Puck's leg was damaged. The muscles had so much scar tissue that Puck lost all feeling in his leg, and also, his leg was so damaged that he lost several movements in his leg, occasionally his leg would even lock up.

Puck and Shelby did have a romantic relationship for a while, but it ended quickly, and now they simply lived together so Beth could have a relationship with her father and her mom. The two of them lived with Beth and lived simple lives.

.o0o.

Three years later and Puck had been promoted to detective, then to special agent. Shelby was able to open her own music school and Beth was just starting preschool. Life was perfect; the pair had a picket fence, a child that loved them, and had great jobs. And even though Puck would still, on occasion, called himself Puckzilla or Puckasuaras, and Shelby and him were not a couple, the two couldn't be happier. Actually Shelby finally told Puck about her love for a man named Mark and Puck finally admitted he was gay, if not bisexual.

The two were in the best years of their lives. Until the Lima Killer came out of nowhere, Puck was assigned to the case. And then the FBI contacted Lima Police and explained that not only was the killer known nationwide, but the that they believed that he was the same Cardiff Killer of the early 2000s. The killer in all instances shared the exact same details, and no copy cat or group killing was that spot on.

.o0o.

"So in conclusion, the UN is going to send one of its best agents that is known for stopping several things that could've been the end of us." The suit said.

Puck rolled his eyes, "And this special Agent is going to work with me?"

"Yeah, Puckerman!" the Chief said, "And this Agent is gonna tell you what to do!"

"But Chief," Puck interjected angrily, "he hasn't got seniority here."

"Well he does now kid." The suit said, "His name is Angel Vaughn and he is on his way now."

"Now, Puckerman, I expect you to respect this kid, he has done a lot for our country." Chief commanded.

"This isn't fair! I don't want to spend my spare time explaining to some suit about our ways." Puck yelled angrily.

"Don't worry Puck, you won't have to show me around town. I am quite familiar with Lima, hell it's my home town." A new voice, yet a very recognizable voice said smoothly.

Puck turned to see one very grown up Kurt Hummel with a smirk on his face.

"Kurt." Puck meant to say the other males name, but it came out as a whisper.

"Puck." The boy rolled his eyes, "Are we going to stand here or are you going to call everyone we know so I can explain this whole thing?"

Puck jumped up and grabbed Kurt roughly by the arm and drug him out of the conference room.

"What the hell, Puckerman!" Kurt yanked his arm from Puck's hand, "You're lucky Will isn't here!"

Kurt turned on Puck.

"We all thought you were dead!" Puck yelled, "You vanished four years ago! Had us-"

"Look I would like to only explain this once, so shut up and tell everyone to meet you a Breadstix in an hour. I've got to go to my hotel, freshen up, contact my partner, and honestly it's a little hard to face everyone again." Kurt said

"Well no shoot!" Puck said, "They thought you were dead!"

"But you didn't." Kurt said so quietly that if Puck hadn't been staring at those lips, he really wouldn't have caught it.

"What?" Puck was confused.

"Every once and a while I hack into some surveillance videos, whenever you're at my 'gravestone' you speak to me as if you're just talking to me on the phone." Kurt explained, then he smiled slightly then looked up and Puck, "You're body language shows it."

Puck was speechless as he thought what Kurt said, "No I didn't."

"Why?" Kurt asked stepping closer to Puck.

"Because Kurt Hummel, does not just up and die, Kurt Hummel does not get kidnapped, and no kidnapper would handle Kurt because you'd just make them go shopping with you." Puck said looking at Kurt, "You're Kurt Hummel. You're not that easy."

Kurt smiled, "Thank you." Kurt hugged the other man and then turned on his heel, "Breadstix, six, under the name Vaughn. And please, don't tell anyone." Kurt walked out of the building and was quick to his hotel.

.o0o.

Puck sat in the private room with the entire high school Glee Club, including the members of Trouble Tones. Sue Sylvester, Burt Hummel, Will Shuster, and Shelby were discussing why Puck had said to come as soon as they could. The rest of the group was simply talking about their days at work. Luckily everyone was home because it was actually the anniversary of Kurt's disappearance, and soon, it would become the anniversary of his reappearance. Beth started to through a fit and ended up hitting Shelby in the face. The group froze when they heard a stern and all too familiar voice scold the child.

"Beth Susan Corkran, you do not treat your mother like that, apologize now or I won't buy you any dessert!"

The group turned to the entrance of the private room to see a mirror image of the countertenor that had gone missing in his senior year of high school.

"Kurt?" Mercedes stood on shaky legs her now petite, tiny form looking fragile.

"Hey, 'Cedes." Kurt smiled shyly at his high school best friend

"KURT!" She squealed as she practically lunged over the table attacking the boy with hugs and kisses. The girl was soon followed by an ecstatic Burt whose true emotions couldn't be put into words, and Carol, a teary eyed Rachel Berry, and a non-stop smiling Shelby. Kurt hugged them all back eagerly.

"Did Puck find you?" Asked Shelby holding onto Kurt

"You could say that." Kurt replied.

"Uncle Kurt!" Screamed Beth jumping into the unprepared mans arms.

"Beth," Kurt was shocked, "knows me."

"Believe it or not Kurt, her first words were, 'Where's Second Daddy?'" Puck announced, "We kept asking her what she meant and finally she screamed your name and cried when we said we didn't know."

Kurt whipped away a tear. "Second Daddy?" He asked in a whisper.

Shelby smiled.

After Kurt hugged everyone twice then hugged his dad, Shelby, and Sue once again.

When the group sat Kurt looked at everyone.

"I'll do my best to answer any questions you have." He stated

Mercedes was first, "What happened?"

Kurt laughed a bit, "I got caught."

"What do you mean Kurt?" asked Will.

"Well, you know I was pretty good with computers, right?" Kurt asked and everyone nodded, "Yeah well the government, China, Russia, the UK and the Middle East did to…when I hack all of them in about, oh, three to five minutes." Kurt said, "At first I was just doing it to get money, in order to support the arts in case Sue won. Then I started to have fun, in fact, the WW3 crisis was due to me reactivating certain nukes in certain areas. The US found out, taught me several martial arts styles, and I became an agent with a license to kill. The government, then, decide it wasn't so smart to have a world class hacker on their hands with a license to kill. So I was turned over to the UN.

The US action to offer my services to the UN was the first of many. I am part of an elite team of agents to eliminate any threat to the majority of the free nations. My partner, Willow, is a world class thief, and is one hell of an undercover. We work together the most, Willow has an act for getting info, I have an act for getting info and the others a pretty fantastic too. And I would have written or called. But you would have been in danger, which is why I changed my bio, my name, and my credentials beyond that." Kurt explained.

The group burst out laughing thinking he was joking.

"He is serious you know." A new voice said.

"Hey Wills." Kurt said without looking.

"Taylor?" Mercedes said shocked.

"Hey big sis, haven't seen you since they separated us during WP." The red-headed boy said, "Don't worry 'bout that Mafia boss though, Kurt took care of him."

Kurt hushed the boy, "Wills, we can't talk about our cases, even when they have to do with family."

"What, she knew I was a government agent, and since I would've showed anyway, she'd connect the dots!" Willow said

"So it's true Kurt," Mercedes asked, "a-and, that man is dead."

"Yeah, Ava," Kurt smiled, "you can go home."


	2. Chapter 2

Kurt sat; ready to have the spot light of him for the fifteen minutes it would take Mercedes/Ava to tell her story. It took her a while to compose herself, even though Willow/Taylor had moved over to comfort her.

"It was a little before seven years ago." She said, still trying to calm her sobs, "A man had loaned my dad money, my mom told him not to. But dad was stubborn; he was set on sending us to that damned private school." She looked at Willow who smiled.

"Our mom tried to deter the wrath of the mob boss. She sold herself to him, did anything she could to keep our family safe. But apparently Dad's breaks on his car locked up. But the two of us were there. Dad survived, as did we obviously, but when we got out of the car a man came. Dad told us to run and the two of us did. We hide and thankfully the guy couldn't find us." Willow choked a bit

"Neither of us had a cell phone, we were to poor. So we ran home," Mercedes took over, "We got there just in time to see mom get shot in the head."

"Luckily the mob boss decided to off mom himself, otherwise he could still be at large."

"What," It was Sam who broke in, "so we're engaged and you lied to me?"

"No!" Kurt said sharply from the corner, "She didn't lie, neither of us did, all we did was what we had to do to keep you safe."

They all turned to Kurt. It was Quinn who spoke first,

"Kurt has a point." Quinn said resting her had on Mercedes back, "Merced-Ava, couldn't tell us. And Kurt needed us safe."

"But why?" Finn asked, "Why does Kurt need us to be safe, he's the one out risking his life!"

They all looked at Kurt once again, intrigued. "Good question." Burt grumbled out, trying to cover up the fact that he was crying.

"Oh, so this came out a lot sooner than I expected!" Kurt scoffed rolling his eye, "I can't tell you it's classified anyway!"

"Kurt we thought you were dead!" Finn yelled at the boy

"Well thank god!" Kurt hissed, "I wouldn't be able to handle your incessant nagging for four more years!"

Finn stepped back and everyone else was silent as the smaller man seemed to somehow tower over the giant.

"Don't talk to him like that!" Rachel said sternly yet softly.

"Sie sind völlig dumm! Ich habe noch nie so eine blinde Zustimmung in meinem Leben gesehen habe!" Kurt yelled, "Ho fatto tutto per te molto, tutti così saresti sicuro e questo è come si risponde?"

The group stared at Kurt as he spoke two differant languages. Then when he started in on a different language they group exchanged glances and looked back at the boy.

"C'est une insulte d'une grande hardiesse, et je ne resterai pas pour elle!" Kurt hissed, finally Willow stepped up.

"Kurt, wǒ xūyào nǐ lěngjìng zuò, hǎo ma? Wǒmen yào gàosu tāmen, shǐ wǒmen nénggòu bìmiǎn zhè yīdiǎn!" Willow said in traditional Chinese.

Kurt looked at the boy and nodded, "You're right."

"So explain," Willow turned to Finn, "and you, sit!"

"My first mission was in Russia." Kurt sighed, "I was assigned to stop a Russian spy from delivering classified US information. Well the information was about me. I was called "Millia Mortis" Death of Thousands."

"I followed the spy until the moment I could first strike. When I did finally get the chance to strike I was shocked that this person had training similar to mine. She knew she was being followed. She had a proposition for me. Join her agency or her team, which already happened into be in place. I killed her, quick, clean, and surgical. I opened the folder and all of your names were in the folder. I hacked the government and deleted all the information that so much mentioned my name, I replace my government passes, and that's when I invented the alias Angel Vaughn. Since then no one has discovered my connection to you lot." Kurt explained.

"What about that team, are they still out there?" Mercedes, leaned forward her now thin form drawing lines against the dark wall paper in the private room of Breadstix.

"No. I came back soon, the deaths were quick and clinical." Kurt said, "I didn't stay because I-I couldn't give it up, I began to enjoy what I did, not the killing, no but the world, seeing it, learning languages, meeting people, and god the men." Kurt chuckled and Willow smiled in remembrance of a private joke.

Kurt and Willow's phones went off with twin beeps, making Shelby cringe. Shelby heard the phones, knew one was Kurt's, but she knew it _wasn't_ Kurt's. At least not her Kurt's. Her Kurt was fun and humble, but extremely conceited, no one stepped on him. This Kurt, well he was a pumped up soldier, a soldier with a license to kill.

Willow and Kurt looked at their phones and exited. Kurt popped his head back in, "You still have my number. I'll rewire it tonight so this number and that number are changed."

The group sat in shock when a waiter came in and told them that the two gentlemen that had left, left a hefty check at the front, and asked him to let the group know that they could get whatever they wanted.

It was after about twenty minutes of conversation that Mercedes, excused herself to the restroom.

"Kurt?" She asked as soon as the phone stopped ringing.

"What up, M?" The sweet angelic voice asked back.

Mercedes check all of the stalls the stood up straight, "They don't suspect a thing."

"Good. I'm sorry to ask you to do this when it's so close to home." Kurt said apologetically.

"It's as much your home as it is mine. You conned the shit out of half this town then disappeared, pretty smart if you ask me." Mercedes answered in reply.

"Yeah." Kurt chuckled lightly, then he sobered, "Think we'll pull this bitch off?"

"We have to." Mercedes said. "Tell Will I said great acting, I've got to get back."

"See ya."

"Bye."

The two hung up and continued with the plan as if the had never spoken. Mercedes had spent time cutting herself off from all her friends. Kurt was trying not to reestablish lost ties, and Willow was probably the only sane one there, either way? Lima Ohio was the next target for the Mendax group.

A/N: Thanks for bearing with me. This is one of my favorite stories, so it pleases me you guys waited while I sorted out my writers block.


	3. Chapter 3

Kurt walked into the building holding a case of donuts from the most expensive donut place he could find. In his hand he held a cup of coffee from the Lima Bean, which he actually found surprising that it was still there, after all last time he heard Starbucks was set to buy it out. But it was a pleasant surprise, because in all honesty, he hated Starbucks, the coffee there was ungodly strong and only helped him if he had to pull and all nighter, not to mention they either added so much sweeteners that your teeth practically fell out, or it was more bitter then Rachel was after they lost Regional's Sophomore year.

So Kurt had seen the existence of the Lima Bean as a blessing from whatever was smiling down at him. And right now, as he walked up to Puckerman's office, he definitely needed a blessing, or another one. The donuts would be a peace offering, and hopefully Kurt would be able to keep his body and hormones at peace while he would inevitably watch Puck pick up a raspberry filled donut, bite into it, moan and not realize when a bit of the raspberry filling dripped down Puck's perfect lips and took resident at the dimple in Puck's chin. Yeah Kurt definitely hoped he'd be able to keep himself in check.

Puck caught Kurt on the way up the stairs and he raised an eyebrow.

"Danish?" He asked causing the smaller boy to jump.

When Kurt realized it was Puck he rolled his eyes.

"No, your favorite. Raspberry filling." Puck blushed slightly.

"I'm bi." He says, seemingly out of the blue, to Kurt anyway.

"Oh." Kurt said looking at Puck with wide eyes.

"I got us the day off." Puck said looking anywhere but at Kurt.

"Oh." Kurt smiled, "Let's go to the lake."

Puck looked at Kurt who was smiling in remembrance of the fun they had senior year at the lake.

"Okay." Puck nodded his agreement.

.o0o.

"Wait," Puck said between a bite of his sandwich, "you always knew I was bi?"

"Well Puck, those looks you gave me weren't exactly subtle on the gaydar." Kurt said leaning back on his hands. "I didn't mind though, I thought about it a lot when I went home."

Puck sputtered and Kurt laughed.

"I thought about you asking me out, I had the perfect date planned out for us." Kurt explained.

"Oh." To Kurt Puck's response sounded rather disappointed, so he looked to the trees and sucked his teeth.

"Yeah. Sometimes I still do." Kurt looked at Puck out of the corner of his eye and smiled when he saw that it looked as if the Jewish stud was at war with himself. Finally after a good ten minutes of silence, Puck broke it.

"Well, would you want to go out with me sometime?" Puck asked hope lacing his tone to the point where it almost made Kurt tell him everything. Instead Kurt choked back his words and smiled at Puck seductively.

"I thought that's what this was." Kurt smirked, earning a smiled from Puck in response.

"Well maybe we should make it official. You remember what we caught Sam and Mercedes doing up here on their third date." Puck said leaning forward.

"Puck you just killed the mood!" Kurt whacked him over the side of the head, "Why would you remind me of Mercedes' pussy when I am totally getting hot for you."

Puck laughed. And Kurt smiled at the taller man.

"Lets go swimming." Kurt stood up suddenly.

"We didn't bring our suits." Puck protested.

"Who said we needed suits." Kurt started to strip and when he got to his underwear, a pair of pink boy shorts, he looked at Puck and winked, "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours."

And with that Puck stripped completely. Kurt looked back at him and stripped himself of his underwear, but only gave Puck a view of his ass before jumping into the water. Puck joined him and the two splashed around happily. Kurt was the first to splash Puck in the face. Puck just dived underwater. Kurt looked around laughing.

"Puck." When he was pulled under his eyes meant brown ones, as neither of them closed their eyes.

Suddenly the two were mashed together in a make out session under the water. The two surfaced after they needed a breathe. Puck, while still kissing Kurt, somehow maneuvered himself and Kurt to the shore.

"Puck I want you in me." Kurt gasped between kisses.

"I didn't bring anything." Puck said pulling back.

"Please Puck."

.o0o.

Willow smiled at Will Shuster. Willow was happy that Kurt and Mercedes had set him up a position at the school, he loved to sing and the fact that he already had a back ground in musical theater helped. Figgins, who had apparently been principal when Kurt and Mercedes went to McKinley, had offered Willow the job as co-coach of the New Directions. Only after Willow showed him and Shuster the competition they were facing in Nationals. Still Willow was happy and the kids loved him, especially after his performance of Won't Say I'm in Love, after Shue had the kids do a ridiculous assignment using Disney songs.

Willow was happy here, he actually felt he could move on. But he couldn't that's why he had to resist the urge to lean forward and kiss the older man, who was so kind…so sweet.

Damn Mercedes. Damn Kurt. Damn Mendax, this was his last job.

.o0o.

Mercedes was the only one that was actually not having second thoughts. After high school she had gone to an acting audition and been told that she'd never make it. She knew both Willow and Kurt where concerned for her, but she saw the looks Kurt and Puck exchanged, and she noticed how much happier Willow was here, in Lima, then any other time.

Mercedes had attempted to get famous, a lot actually, before she joined Mendax. She could act. She could sing. She was a regular Jennifer Hudson. But no one would give her a chance. She was stuck. A year after Kurt disappeared he came and offered her a job.

"_It'll be like you're in a movie, acting and singing your way into the credits."_ Is what Kurt had told her so she gave everything up to do this. But then again, what exactly had she given up? She didn't have a life, she was working at a dinner in Chicago at nights and a café in the morning. Mendax was her life now. And she was gonna be damned if she gave it up, even if Kurt and Willow decided to.


	4. Chapter 4

Hey everybody!

I know, I know! I've been a bad, bad boy! I have spent the last few YEARS-oh god that felt terrible to say-attempting to continue the stories I have written that I have already posted. And finally I have realized why I can't continue them. And so it is with excitement and hope and a brand new year that I inform you all that I will be rewriting. Salvaging every story, but reworking them into a much more adult fashion, with a more mature outcome.

I hope you will all be patient with me in this process and I am hopeful that my fans, no, rather my friends will stick with me just a slight longer.

On another note I am seeking betas! Anyone interested simply pm me and we can talk details and fandoms.

Now I am kicking of these rewrites with a new story in the Doctor Who Universe. This story is currently untitled and involves the Doctor in his "last days." As I write this story and send it off to my beta, for every two chapters I will have rewritten three chapters of another story.

Once again thank you for bearing with me and thank you for your companionship, your support and your love.

Yours Truly and Forever,

SpikeXander'sDrink


	5. Chapter 5

Hey Everyone,

So I am proud to announce that I have completely reworked of my personal favorite fan fictions. Slaying Forks: Bella's Becoming is now entitled simply _**Bella. **_I am super pumped to announce this world, and write this. It is turning out very much unexpected, for even me. And I **never**thought I would ever ship anyone but Bella and Edward, or Edward and the entire male cast of Twilight. But it happened.

This story is a Crossover Universe in which Bella is a Vampire Slayer. Before she came to Forks she was an active slayer in Phoenix. Training at a "Girl's School," which was set up by Buffy, and the New Council. Now I know what happened in the BtVS comics, and this is not going to be cannon to that. This takes place around a month before Bella is set to marry Edward.

I encourage you all to set me up as one of your author alerts. And head on over to _**"Bella," **_as soon as I post it and you get a chance. I am midway through the first chapter and have the entire story outlined already, I am open to small suggestions, and I will answer all questions, even if they don't pertain to this particular fiction, or any of my fictions.

Now I did say I was attempting to avoid O/C's but I think I found a good balance, between Bella the Slayer, Bella the girl, and Bella the friend, through my O/Cs. I am excited to introduce one particular O/C from Bella's own childhood.

I hope to really draw attention to Bella's different reactions then that of Faith's, Buffy's or any other Slayer we've seen in the Buffyverse.

_With love, passion and hope,_

_Spikexander'sdrink_


End file.
